Monday 2 June 2014

B is for Banana

This post is part of the Spanking A-Z Blog Challenge. What's that I hear you ask? Check out my page here for more information.

Who doesn’t love a banana? As the Hoosier Hotshots once sang:
I don’t like your peaches
They are full of stones
But I like bananas
Because they have no bones 
And yet, worrying, it would seem from looking at the internet that there are swathes of people out there who simply have no idea at all how to eat one.

No, you see, you won't get very far just licking it. 

 Oh sweetie, that’s not right at all. 

 Just stop it now! You are doing bananas wrong! 

 Of course if you ever do manage to work out how to get inside one, then a banana’s a great treat – full of potassium, manganese, vitamin B6 and thrilling little doses of radiation. You don’t just have to eat them raw. There are loads of great banana recipes out there, you could try banana pancakes, or banana bread or perhaps this...

Oh my dear god. 
 Apparently in the 1970s people were being encouraged to stick a banana in a pineapple ring and call it a banana candle.The recipe is even more disturbing than the picture consisting as it does of bananas, pineapple rings, lemon juice, glace cherries and mayonnaise. I can’t even work out if it’s meant to be sweet or savoury. I’m sure it’s perfectly possible to make a savoury banana dish if you serve it with some pork or something. But a bit of lettuce and a spurt of mayonnaise don’t really seem enough to make this not-a-dessert. Mayonnaise doesn’t really make things savoury, does it? Just greasy.

Quite frankly, I’m not sure that enough respect is being paid to the humble banana. We should introduce an International Banana Day, to foster banana love amongst the populace and introduce people to the correct ways of eating the things. Maybe people could celebrate Banana Day by dressing in suitable celebratory costumes?

 Yup. Something like that would be just perfect.
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8 comments:

  1. You are completely naughty Etta Stark! That was hilarious and I thank you! Is there a buy link for that banana costume???

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    1. Sadly not. Although if you want something tasteful for your next costume party, you could try this:

      http://www.amazon.co.uk/Artis-Giant-Inflatable-Willy-Costume/dp/B006833Z1Y/ref=sr_1_63?ie=UTF8&qid=1401735912&sr=8-63&keywords=banana+costume

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  2. I'll never look at a banana the same way again.

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  3. Thank you for the laugh! I will admit that a banana is my very favorite fruit.....and hubby does love to watch me eat one! :O

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    1. As long as you don;t try and east it like the girls in the third picture. That's the most horrific from a phallic point of view. You wouldn't be able to do that with a real penis unless something had gone horribly awry.

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  4. ROFL Loved it! And if you ever need more disturbing banana photos, I have a couple I could send over *snicker*.

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  5. OMG. So funny. I do hope those poor girls figure out how to eat a banana...

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